Emotionally

“… yang menyakitkan bukan perpisahan, tapi kenangan yang tiba-tiba muncul ke permukaan.”

“iya… iya… udah. Apa lagi?”

“dengerin…….”

“ah. Cukup. Basi.”

“yaudah di ingetin. Jangan sampe terulang. Kan tau sekarang gimana keadaannya.”

“makanya gak usah bawa-bawa perasaan”

“atau, bohong sama perasaan?”

“… menurut mu?”

“…”

“I’m okay, cheers”

"you have to act like you don't care at all. maybe it's better"

"membesarkan gelak tawa. menebar riuh, beradu riang, dan menganggap semuanya akan baik-baik saja, biar sajalah seperti itu."

Penat amat, yah. Bingung mau gimana. Gak mau cengeng, banci. Siapa? Siapa yang curhat? Enggak. Entah kenapa semua berjalan sangat datar. Bangun, ngaca, dan datar. Biasa aja.

Everyone has their own hiding place, and mine is something i’m going to tell you about. I never realized it until i found out how hard it is to hide with this kind of society i’m living between. I’m always one click away from people, and i can never really be unreachable.

People seem to like how easy it is nowadays to keep in touch. Because i cannot find a place to hide, i create one. My hiding place is nowhere but inside my head. I hide inside my own thoughts. I enjoyed the fact that no one can really know what’s inside my head without my permission. As long as i remain silent, as long as i don’t tell them what’s going on there. It’s a total mess inside, but those messes are the mess that i enjoy being with.