I am all alone

The tittle is not a lyric of a song. I guess I'm just being afraid of what people would think. You know, judgment. I guess it's really easy to say like, "I don't care what anyone else thinks." but, everyone does. Deep down. I find myself so furious at all these people that I'm in contact with. I mean I just wanna be able to do anything I want, it makes me feel alive. Whatever that means. I really never had a best friend. I called them my close friend that I love. I would do anything for them. I don't know they will do the same thing like I did. Till I found you. I really like talking with you. I don’t usually even try to vocalize my thoughts or feelings or anything. I don’t know, it never sounds right. Words are stupid. But with you, it's like I have everything. I'm alone in this city. My parents are far away from here. It takes miles to see them and tells how's everything's going. So you, you are the closest person that taking care of me. I'm glad to have you here, protects me. I need a person like you. I don't have to vocalize my thoughts. Just seeing you make me feel alive. That's why I'm so protective with mine. But I know it's running bad. I'm sorry. I'm sorry to make you feel uncomfortable with me. My attitude broke this chemistry that we built. I haven't learned from past