A Lesson

"Postingan kali ini tadinya cuma sebuah draft, tulisan yang gw buat sebelum berakhirnya tahun 2012. Tapi, kalian bisa ambil pelajaran dari cerita gw ini. So, let's just start.."

sepertinya saya capek

benar, saya capek

tapi kertasnya masih kosong

jadi saya capek karena apa?

sepertinya malam selalu menegaskan kesendirian

tapi saya sering malu mengaku kesepian

sepi karena sendiri

i forget when i officially broke up with Zayn Malik after been together for more than a year (or maybe less than a year? i really forget) He was the first and -until now still- the only guy whom I gave my fully heart, that much that I didn't use my logic loving him, even a bit. Yah, that's me. He was the guy who always taught me and correct me if i was wrong. He was the type of guy who really kind and care whenever i was sick and felt cold.

"Oh Cit? Really? You wrote that one? Haha you must be feeling guilty and insane re-read that."

I couldn't count how many fights we did which each resulting abusive words.

now I feel like reborn and so much happier. I've learned that to make a relationship is not to own, to love is not to hang your life to someone, to love is to mix both of your heart and your logic, to love is to take and give in same amount, to love is to be loved and to make you happy. Well I wish he feels the same way with me. We'd messed each other's life but for sure will be -at least, a little bit- better in interpreting a relationship :)

"Well, my life in the end of 2012 mostly not as happy as 2011, but then has opened my eyes about a lesson that to walk out of your comfort-zone is to make you learn and more understand about things you probably never thought before. And now on, I'm sitting in front of my laptop continue writing this stuff. Again, life has led me growing up as a person and that's so meaningful for me. Thanks."